The Weekend Has Landed

The Weekend has Landed, it’s finally here
With guests lining up for a reason to cheer
A drink with which to propose a toast
Food to nibble, pumpkin seeds, roast

From offices high and far and wide,
The people descend with one purpose in mind,
The fabulous, rich, the poor and the plain
Shoving and pushing and ‘Beer me again!’

With tastes diverse and palettes to please
It’s my job to serve them and charge them their fees
Our Selection diverse and our beer list is long,
‘Ere, scuse me matey, get rid of that bong’

Sorry to break from this tale I must tell
But drugs in a bar is my vision of hell
Clean spirits is what we want you to take
So that hangover free you will hopefully wake

Or beer, that most noble and ancient of ales
The hops, the malt, the incredible smells
Of little yellow flowers in an English field
Bobbing around to the wind that they yield

There’s a ruckus in the corner it seems to me
And someone may have said something funny
That wasn’t taken as well as it might
And suddenly now we’ve got our first fight.

Good Adam descends and pulls them apart
‘Fore damage is done to a bodily part
Hands are shaken and pats on the back
‘Sorry old boy, I’ll cut you some slack’

These are the problems we often will face
When drink makes feelings get out of place
But a kind word can soothe and smooth and disarm
For none come here with intent to do harm

I’ll break way now and leave you to drink
Afore all the customers cause a stink
Waiting and thirsting for spirits or beer
Longing and needing some Friday night cheer

The weekend has landed, it’s finally here,
And it’s time to make my guests feel so very queer
The spirits are flowing and the beer shoots out
Lager and bitter, Pilsner and stout.

-Andy Charlton

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